Yesterday I ate so much the food started to mix with my stomach lining, but now the food bloat has gone down and my hands have regained their ability to type an intelligent sentence.

Christmas, such a wonderful time of year  for a variety of reasons. It’s as if magic mixes with air from the first of December until the highly anticipated twenty fifth day. Whether you love the hustle and bustle, the  lights that seem to illuminate every store window, or the meaning behind the season; Christmas is a time of true joy for almost everyone.

This year carried extra meaning for me. Last Thursday we received the news that my dad’s cancer is in remission, a fact that left me with alligator tears in my eyes and a heart full of hope. The moment I found out he was going to be alright, it no longer mattered if there were ten presents under the tree or none at all. All I could think about was that life was going to regain some of the normalcy I had been craving for months. He is going to make it and so am I.

Sitting around the dinner table this Chritsmas, I felt that I had been given the privledge to be there rather than the right. I had survived some of the worst days of my life and now I had the opportunity to sit around a table full of food with people who truly loved me, and I can’t ever ask for more than that. Life has had its tough moments lately but as I sat at that table I wasnt thinking about that, I was suspended in a moment with a laugh leaving my lips and a smile crossing my face. There was nothing else I was left wanting

Although, aside from my dad’s health, my favorite gift this year are the pancake socks santa left for me. These fine foot blankets are defiantly my new cooking/stuffing me face/sleeping/homework/living/funeral socks.

Merry Christmas everyone, I hope your holiday was filled with love and laughter.

 

 

There are times in life when we all loose our way a little. Maybe we took a wrong turn and ended up in the middle of nowhere, or maybe we started to like waffles more than pancakes; a crime punishable by permanent, sticky syrup fingers.

I let my happiness become a factor depending only on the mere whim of the fickle world.

Back in the sweltering  heat of early July I was looking for the perfect bikini body and a jock named Bret. Instead I got mud stains called cancer on the white carpet that was my life, and I was left to clean it up. It decided to play nice sometimes and others it snapped at me with every swipe of my mop.

After my dad was diagnosed I started to let my mind slip away into a haze of worst case scenarios and what ifs. I let every word, every glance, every mere movement hit me like a tsunami I believed was threatening to drown me. I took a long five weeks after finding out about dad until I remember experiencing true happiness again.

I was sitting in a Chick-fil-a staring out the long panel of windows as rain poured down when I saw a man pull up to the drive-thru with a huge smile on his face. He laughed at something as he took his food from the hand of the drive-thru operator and drove up next to where I was sitting. He was singing along to the radio while shoving his chicken sandwich in his wide mouth, all with a grin the size of the sun sat on his face.

There was something about the way he chose to be so joyful on a day so bleak that made me smile. An intense happiness filled my chest like never before as I watched him drive away, knowing he was still singing. I think I realized that it doesn’t matter what life gives you, there is still good to be seen, grasped, and enjoyed.

There will always be tough times in life, but if we let that stop us from taking in the good parts we will never live at all.

Sometimes I lose my way, but one thing I know is that I can always find something to smile about, whether it’s the Chick-fil-a man or just a good pancake.

For all my pancake lovers who go to Catholic High, you know how tough this week has been. Our first day back from a long Thanksgiving break and we learned of the death of an alumni, one many knew, loved, and cared for. Just days later, the child of a alumni lost her battle to cancer. We remembered their lives through masses, an assembly, and adoration.

For the first time in six months my family was able to enjoy a meal without the threat of an impending round of chemo looming in the air. Dad is now done with all treatments until the end of the month when we determine where we stand with the enemy, cancer. We were able to spend the break together doing normal family things, like making pancakes. I truly enjoyed the normalcy of the break.

It was a trying Tuesday morning beginning with an emotional assembly. The site of tear streaked faces made it hard to continue with the day. The harsh contrast of my relaxing and the tension of school was a shock to my system. In this time before Christmas, I was expecting a lively environment full of excitement. It’s hard to watch the school community, including my own friends, grieve the loss of these girls.

There is very little positivity floating around right now, not just at my school, but everywhere. Tragedy seems to be affecting many this season. I firmly believe what we put out into the world comes back to us, so in the coming weeks I challenge EVERYONE to spread a little love to someone who needs it. Big or small we should all try to put some positive energy in the air by preforming random acts of kindness. One small act could be writing an uplifting note to a friend, or go big and host a pancake party. Either way, your actions are important.

So let’s flood the air with good vibes and smiles, who knows, maybe it will come back to us when we need it.

And to the LCHS pancakes, don’t forget about our own commitment to #RACk15 to honor the lives of those we lost.